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Saturday, August 14, 2010

The good...the sad...the weight of it all

This morning it's the real deal - time to get everything packed. I have shoved everything I can into the bag I'll check, and there are 14 lbs to go! I'm officially excited that my flight changed because I can bring so much more. Henry and I are going through my drawers and anything that's too small is getting packed. It will go to the nannies and mothers. Hopefully. I'd suspect I'm a tad bit bigger than the Haitian women. (And by TAD I mean...)

Henry is being a dream now, after a huge toddler tantrum this morning. He's on the bed counting, calling out shapes, and petting "Geeky Boy" our rescue kitty. It's so sweet.

And then it hits me. I am leaving my children for over 10 days. The weight of that thought is really heavy right now. Will there be any tears left in me before I leave?

I trust the postcard that I got so many months ago. I trust that my children will be safe. I trust that I will be safe. I trust that Jason will do just fine being home with the kids. Yet I'm finding this really hard right now. But I'm not nervous. (Ask me if I am when I land in Port-au-Prince.)

I know that I am just one person. A blip on the screen of the need that's in Haiti. Yet I feel a higher purpose of this trip. There's something bigger brewing here - I just haven't figured it out yet.

One more post tomorrow before I leave. It's time to revisit the postcard.

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