Help buy a piece of the pad

You'll notice just to the right of this post is a ChipIn button. I'm trying to raise $1,000 to buy two iPads for COTP. Why iPads you ask, well let me tell you!

First things first - Apple products can handle the harsh climate in Haiti. I don't know what it is, but other computers seem to crap out a lot quicker than Apple. Kinda cool, because I'm a total Apple junkie. I speak their language when it comes to computers.

Why specifically iPads? Have you ever tried one? Amazing little contraptions. With an iPad they can link to their server so whoever is carrying it has access to everything. One will specifically be used to help inventory the pharmacy. This will ensure they have the life-saving meds and supplies they need at all times.

iPad - $499.

Saving a little life - priceless.

If you feel the passion, the call, the desire, or if your couch has some extra money in it, I'd LOVE it if you'd contribute to the cause.

Help buy a piece of the pad.

There are 40+ babies there right now. Imagine changing the diapers of 40+ babies. How many diapers and wipes would you go through in a day? Interesting you should ask. They need diapers. Specifically sizes 3 and 4. Having disposable diapers keeps them from having to use cloth ones. I know all you tree huggers - I'm married to one - cloth is better for the environment. But just think - there are no washing machines at COTP. A group of women washes all the clothes AND diapers BY HAND every single day. I don't know about you, but to me the thought of washing diapers for 40 is kinda gnarly.

Here's a complete list of urgent needs:
* Liquid hand soap
* Hand sanitizer
* Rice cereal
* Diapers all sizes - but right now sizes 3 & 4
* Baby lotion
* Bar soap

Here's where you can send the goods:
Bud and Jan Bonnema
Agape Flights CAP--11952
100 Airport Ave
Venice, FL 34285

Here's a thought to keep in the back of your brain. When you stay at a hotel next time, take all the soap products. Every day. You're paying for it. Save up those bars of soap and shampoo. When you've gathered a good stash, ship it off to Haiti. The nannies will thank you!

Peaceful Impatience

I am not a patient person. There - I got it out. When it comes to waiting for just about anything I start to go a little crazy. Rush hour traffic, people who are late for meetings, 40 weeks to get a baby out of my belly - impatient.

Right now God is forcing me to be patient, and it's irritating me. Can you write that on a blog and not get zapped by lightening? If the world DOES come to an end today, you can blame me.

One of my favorite movies is Evan Almighty. Side note - when I die, I so want Morgan Freeman to be God. Wouldn't that be the coolest? At any rate, how many people go to a comedy and end up crying? Can you see my hand raised up nice and high? That was me. Sitting next to Sofia, crying in the theater.

There are many amazing, profound lines in that movie. Here's one of my favorites. This is God talking to Evan's wife. She had just left him because he wouldn't let go of building the A.R.K. and the whole world, including her, thought he was a nut bar.

God: "Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?"

I have prayed for patience. A lot. Little did I know what I was setting myself up for.

Right now we're waiting on a phone call. One stinkin' phone call. That will be the deciding factor - the moment of truth - in this adoption process.

Just pick up the phone, right? Well, it's Haiti. In Haiti you don't just pick up the phone and make a connection and get all the answers that will make a woman in Wisconsin breathe a sigh of relief. Nope. I have to wait.

I have to be patient.

I don't wanna be patient.

Maybe they'll make the call today?.......

12:01

I don't know where to start with this. Yesterday I was rejoicing as I ran the final copies of our French translations, knowing our dossier was complete. Five pounds of our life in paper. Months worth of work, challenges, frustrations, money - complete. I felt relieved, but for some reason I wasn't celebrating like I thought I would.

The goal today was to get the dossier in the mail - off to Love Basket - so it could be in Haiti by next Thursday. The next big step in the adoption process. A huge step.

I got everything sorted, made sure it was all there, and put it in a large plastic ziploc before sealing up the box. After all that work, I wanted to make sure there was no risk of it getting ruined by getting wet. A long-shot, I know, but I wasn't going to risk it.

Just before noon I picked up the sealed Priority Mail box and was off to the post office. It was really hard to hand over. After I finished paying, I put my hand on the box and said a quick prayer. I told the clerk what was in the box, and she blessed it. Isn't that amazing?

I got back to the office at 12:01. Pretty sure that time is going to be burned into my brain for a long time. 12:01. The time when everything changed.

Everything.

There was an email waiting for me. 12:01. From Robin at COTP. She wanted a number to call me at. Not good. While we've emailed a bit, we've never talked. There's no reason to talk.

12:01. There's a reason to talk.

Karen, I've just got to come out and tell you this. Magdaline's family came today and picked her up. She's going to live with an uncle in Miami.

12:01. Everything has changed.

The rational Karen realizes that this is what's best for Magdaline. If she's got biological family who wants to raise her, they need to raise her.

I just lost a second little girl. 12:01. Can we just turn back time please?

After a great conversation with Jason we agreed that we would continue the adoption process. There are other little ones who need a home. God is calling us to adopt - and we will honor that calling.

I'll admit that I cried the entire drive home from work. I cried really hard. This process is so emotional. So frustrating. So consuming. My heart is broken yet again.

But God has a grand plan in all of this. There's a reason He called Josette home. There's a reason a healthy Magdaline was brought home while here on Earth.

God has a plan. More grand than you and I could ever imagine.

12:01. Our daughter awaits.