There she was...

Every day that passes without hearing about movement on the adoption front is torture. My mind starts to drive me crazy as I wonder about everything. Where are we at. Who has our file. What is she doing. Who is loving her up today. It goes on and on.

Adopting parents are pretty impatient. It can't happen soon enough. There isn't one parent out there who says, "I'm so glad the adoption took 6 months longer than we expected..." or "I'm happy they delayed our meeting by a week. What does that week matter anyway?" No. We're quite the opposite. If I got a call tonight that we were through the process, I'd be on the first plane to Haiti tomorrow. If that wasn't possible I'd start working on beaming technology so I could get down there. I would go in the clothes I'm wearing and spend the entire week in this same outfit if it meant I could bring her home. I'd forgo all luxuries like a toothbrush, clean underwear and my coveted Burt's Bee's lipgloss if I knew I could hold her.

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The other day I added her picture to the wallpaper on my computer at work. When I logged in this morning, there she was. It's the front side of the picture I posted earlier. The most beautiful little girl I have ever seen. She was there smiling at me. It's as though she was saying, "I'm ok Mommy. They are taking great care of me. I'll be here waiting for you!"

I paused, said a prayer, told her I loved her, then started my day. It was a beautiful way to start the day. 

The day was unusually busy, and by the time I went to shut down I had forgotten who was waiting for me. As I closed out my Outlook, there she was again. "I'm glad you had a good day at work Mommy. I was here with you the whole time. God's in charge Mommy. Don't forget that."

I paused, said a prayer, told her I loved her, told her angel mother I'd take great care of her, then grabbed my bag and headed for the parking lot.